guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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