Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Randomize
