So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
