I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
4 words: hood of his car
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
