So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Randomize
