Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Im part way to drunk.
Randomize
