I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Randomize
