Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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