U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize