just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
