I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize