At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Randomize
