party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Randomize
