were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
