I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
