Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Oh god it's open bar.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
