So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
