sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
