there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Randomize
