Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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