at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
