i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
