I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Randomize
