Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
