I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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