you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
