That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize