dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
