hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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