You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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