If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
