I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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