Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
