We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
