the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Randomize
