I like to think it a success when the cops are called
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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