There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
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