Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
