I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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