I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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