Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
