so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize
