Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
