PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
