i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
