Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
