After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
You have to summon your inner elephant
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
