did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
