we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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