hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
