I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
