I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
