Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
You ruined the universe
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
